Mary Ricksen

Daddy Loves Everything About His Little Girl!

2010-04-23T16:53:00.010-04:00

Can you see three animals in this picture?

Hi everyone, j
just wanted to make you laugh and remember when your kids were this young.
I laughed at this one. I could just as easily done it. And yes, ugh!
But daddy loves his little girl and he never woulda thought it!

This one is for everyone who...
a) has kids
b) had kids
c) was a kid
d) knows a kid
e) is going to have kids.
I guess that means all of us!!

DADDY'S GONNA EAT YOUR FINGERS

I was packing for my business trip and my three year old daughter was having a

wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point she said, 'Daddy, look at this' ,

and stuck out two of her fingers.

Trying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her tiny fingers in my mouth and said ,
'Daddy's gonna eat your fingers,' pretending to eat them.

I went back to packing, looked up again and my daughter was standing on the bed

staring at her fingers with a devastated look on her face.

I said, 'What's wrong, honey?'

She replied,
'What happened to my booger?'

If that ain't unconditional love, I don't know what is!
Hope you laughed. That's the idea.

I couldn't resist.

I wish you all have your dreams come true and you are able to smile through what it takes to get there!

Rules to Live By

2010-04-10T20:48:00.005-04:00

To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice!
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks . Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write 'For Marijuana'.
6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.
7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
9. Sing Along At The Opera.
10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.
11. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'
12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity

14. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.

Yes, I Love Funny Stories! And This Is Funny!

2010-04-03T21:21:00.003-04:00

ONLY A MAN WOULD ATTEMPT THIS

Just try reading this without laughing till you cry!!!

Pocket Tazer Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife.

A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Tazer for their anniversary submitted this:

Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife Julie. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized Tazer.

The effects of the Tazer were supposed to be short lived, with no long term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to safety....??

WAY TOO COOL! Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button and pressed it against a metal surface at the same time, I'd get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.

AWESOME!!! Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.

Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two AAA batteries, right?

There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target.

I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and then thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised.

Am I wrong?

So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and Tazer in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; and a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.

All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5" long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference (loaded with two itsy, bitsy AAA batteries); pretty cute really, and thinking to myself, 'no possible way!'

What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best.

I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side so as to say, 'Don't do it stupid,' reasoning that a one second burst from such a tiny lil ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad.. I decided to give myself a one second burst just for heck of it.

I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and...

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD. WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION. WHAT THE... !!!

I'm pretty sure Hulk Hogan ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs! The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the living room.

Note: If you ever feel compelled to 'mug' yourself with a Tazer, one note of caution: there is NO such thing as a one second burst when you zap yourself! You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor! A three second burst would be considered conservative! A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace... The recliner was upside down and about 8 feet or so from where it originally was. My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching. My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. I had no control over the drooling. Apparently I had crapped in my shorts, but was too numb to know for sure, and my sense of smell was gone.. I saw a faint smoke cloud above my head, which I believe came from my hair.

I'm still looking for my testicles and I'm offering a significant reward for their safe return!

PS: My wife can't stop laughing about my experience, loved the gift and now regularly threatens me with it!

If you think education is difficult, try being stupid!!!!

My New Outlook On Life

2010-03-17T23:27:00.000-04:00

The first thing you have to do is remove all negativity from your mind. Yep, every bit of it. Even if it ain't yours let it go!

Avoid things that confuse you.

Share good fortune with your friends.

Heed the warning signs.

Be courageous and don't be afraid to try new things.

Enjoy your friends.

Be kind and life will be kind to you.

Remember, you make your own happiness! But, you can make those around you happy. Oh and dance while you still can!

Friends. What would we do without them.

2010-02-27T16:42:00.003-05:00

Ah yes, today I write about friends. A friend will always be there for you.

A friend doesn't care what you look like.

Friends make you laugh.

Friends mean everything.

AR&T love you.
My best friend died recently of brain cancer and my heart broke. All I have now is memories and thoughts of what might be, that never will.
She was proud. I wonder if it had to do with her Indian heritage. She was strong and she was weak too. Gosh I miss her.

Peggy and me. But I have made a lot of friends through writing. Publishing a book gave me so much more than a book. It gave me a new outlook on life. Because now I have so many new friends my heart is overwhelmed. And I thank the powers that are every day for this new gift. Love you guys. Each and every one of you.

Laugh and You'll Write Better!

2010-02-21T20:03:00.009-05:00

So are you ready for a little chuckle. A touch of humor?

So how is your sense of humor?

THE
> OLD MOTOR
> The marriage of an 80 year old man and a 20 year old woman was the talk of the
> town.
>
> After being married a year, the couple went to the
> hospital for the birth
> of their first child.
>
> The attending nurse came out of the delivery room to
> congratulate the old
> gentleman and said,
>
> 'This is amazing. How do you do it at your age?'
>
> The old man grinned and said, 'You got to keep the old
> motor running.'
>
> The following year, the couple returned to the
> hospital for the birth of
> their second child.
>
> The same nurse was attending the delivery
> and again went out to
> congratulate the old gentleman.
>
> She said, 'Sir, you are something! How do you manage
> it?'
>
> The old man grinned and said, 'You gotta keep the old
> motor running.'
>
> A year later, the couple returned to the hospital for the
> birth of their third
> child.
>
> The same nurse was there for this birth also and, after the
> delivery, she once
> again approached the old gentleman, smiled, and said,
> 'Well, you surely are
> something awesome! How do you do it?'
>
> The old man replied, 'It's like I've told you
> before, you gotta keep the old
> motor running.'
>
> The nurse, still smiling, patted him on the back and said:
> Well, I guess it's
> time to change the oil. This one is black!'

One last thought, take it to the bank.

One for each of you who comments! Choose by first in line.

Do You Drink?

2010-02-16T20:01:00.003-05:00

Who doesn't come home from a hard day at work and want to sit down to a cold one?

Maybe you like something a bit stronger?

Although I suggest if you are going to have more than a few do it at home, or this could you.

Or this...shameful!

You'd be surprised at who likes a drink or two.

You go out to meet someone and hope for the best.

Just remember you could end up like this.

Public Speaking

2010-02-03T19:35:00.006-05:00

I have been working on my second book feverishly. I still have a ways to go. I'm not yet happy.

This one is so different than the first, even though it's one of a series. Here's a slight clue. It's called Burned Into Time. That's a biggie right there! My heroine gets burned into time!

But I am taking a break to talk about speaking in public.
Yes, this is a big problem for me, and it might be one for many of you. My fear of being in front of people has put a damper on a lot of things. I freeze and have to plug myself back in for a few seconds. Deep inside the words are trying to emerge.

I have great fear that something like this will happen!

Shell shocked I will sit there and try to read the words or even remember what I am doing there! The anti nerve pills ain't working and your stomach has a fire breathing dragon in it.
With a force that comes from who knows where takes over, like an alien, I push myself to say the words. Bluemberglst? Yeah that makes sense. And I remember what one of my FRW friends said to me. Picture them naked. Ha! that just might work.

One thing I can be sure of is that no matter how badly I do, Traci will tell me I did great!
Friends well

Yeah, that's exactly what I need to say!

Are You A Dog Or A Cat Person?

2010-01-16T20:35:00.002-05:00

Who can resist a cute little puppy?

Or an adorable little kitten.
Which one are you, a dog or a cat person?

Each of us has a preference for breed.

Some people look like their pets. For some of us they are family members.

Just like my boy Junior!

There are people who should live as well as this dog does. But, I have to admit, no one has ever broken into my house.

The Author Roast And Toast cooks Skhye Moncrief

2010-01-14T20:02:00.003-05:00

Come by and visit the http://authorroastandtoast.blogspot.com

The hostess's of the AR&T cook their next victim! Come and visit on Friday 1/15

Be there or be square!

Hey it's Cuddles bad cousin Muddles, uh oh, that can't be good! He sneezes and causes trouble!

Januray Burrrrrr Some Graphics for You.

2010-01-09T21:58:00.005-05:00

Ordinarily this is South Florida in January. The usual temperature is in the seventies during the day and low seventies at night. But this week we have proof that global warming is a spoof.
Because, this is South Florida today.

None of us knows what to do.
So I just thought I'll post some cool graphics

Something that makes me feel good to look at.

Invokes a feeling. The graphic artist or photographer makes magic.

Which is just what I try to do as an author. And if we do it right. You will feel it.

This one says cute. Have a good one.

What I Want From 2010

2010-01-01T16:28:00.007-05:00

I want to have a home in a rural area, away from the big city, but close to a good hospital and stores.

I want a new puppy to cuddle and keep Junior company.

I want to feel peace.

I want beautiful flowers and lots of books to read

My DH to keep me company.

And I want a new book to come out this year. The sequel to Tripping Through Time.
Burned Into Time is the story of Lacy McCalley. The sister of the heroine in book one travels back in time.
She doesn't get to leave as she planned to. She's burned into time is the best way to explain it.
A wonderful man saves her. But the burns have destroyed her self image. She doesn't want her sister to see her this way.
Why would a man fall in love with her? Especially now.
What she forgets is that love conquers all and that love is blind.
Ain't that great?!

Happy New Year to Everyone!!! May you live your heart's desire!

Just A Little Christmas Fun

2009-12-21T19:31:00.003-05:00

This picture invokes thoughts of a warm holiday and that perfect atmosphere.
This next bit makes me laugh.

While trying to escape through Pakistan , Osama Bin Laden found a bottle on the sand and picked it up.
>
> Suddenly, a female genie rose from the bottle and with a smile said, "Master, may I grant you one wish?"
>
> Osama responded," You ignorant, unworthy daughter-of-a-dog! Don't you know who I am? I don't need any common woman giving me anything."
>
> The shocked genie said, "Please, I must grant you a wish or I will be returned to that bottle forever."
>
> Osama thought a moment, then grumbled about the impertinence of the woman and said, "Very well, I want to awaken with three American women in my bed in the morning. So just do it and be off with you.
>
> " The annoyed genie said, "So be it!" and disappeared.
>
> The next morning Bin Laden woke up in bed with Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding, and Nancy Pelosi at his side.
>
> His penis was gone, his knees were broken, and he had no health insurance.
>
> God is good.

I know I'm bad. But I couldn't stop myself.

Here's a present for all my friends.

Author Roast and Toast On Friday 12/18

2009-12-17T19:27:00.004-05:00

The Author Roast and Toast crew is hosting Kathleen O'Connor on Friday. Come to her party. The atmosphere is warm and compelling.

Make a comment and have some fun with this cyber party. Oliver will be making some of his specialties for our guests. And Kathleen is looking awfully good in her new outfit.

http://authorroastandtoast.blogspot.com

And please,

The Thing About Christmas

2009-12-15T20:10:00.004-05:00

We each have a picture of what is Christmas in our heads. A lovely scene with lots of lights. One of the first things to enter my mind is, go home for Christmas.

Maybe a beautiful wreath?

A special tree that touches your heart. A toasty fireplace to warm your cold hands.

Maybe it's Santa Claus, or the Nativity. A bit of both?

Whatever it is. I wish you the best, Merry Christmas, no matter what!

Okay One Joke to make you laugh

A man was riding his Harley beside a Sydney beach when suddenly the
>> sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice, The Lord said.
>> 'Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will
>> grant you one wish.'
>> The biker pulled over and said, 'Build a bridge to New Zealand so I
>> can ride over anytime I want.'
>>
>> The Lord said; 'Your request is materialistic, think of the enormous
>> challenges for that kind of undertaking, the supports required
>> reaching the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it
>> would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can
>> do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly
>> things. Take a little more time and think of something that could
>> possibly help mankind.'
>>
>> The biker thought hard about it for a long time. Finally, he said,
>>
>> 'Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand our wives. I want
>> to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me
>> the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says
>> nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy'.
>>
>> The Lord replied;
>> 'You want two lanes or four on that bridge?"

It's beginning to get close to Christmas!

2009-12-10T19:44:00.004-05:00

My father used to decorate the house when I was a kid, inside my mom was allowed to help, but outside was a historical event. Every year he added more and more to the decorations. We lived in Burlington, Vermont at this time. When he started to do this, the neighbors began to do it too. It was like a contest and the more decorations the better. He spent a fortune on it and it showed.

Every window had a candle and every window was decorated with the white spray snow. The closer to Christmas it got the more the men of the neighborhood scrambled. Especially when the city of Burlington held a contest for the best decorated yard. Alarms musta gone off, because all efforts doubled!

The winner won a hundred dollars, a lot at the time and the house would be featured in the Burlington Free Press.

Well my father won and we still have that picture framed in my mom's living room. For him it was worth the effort and it made the holidays just a bit more exciting. Decorations are just what you need to get into the mood and feeling.

My parents made Christmas so special. I used to think the magic was Christmas time, when my parents were the one's who really made it magic! Thanks mom and dad, for making Christmas so special for us.

Merry Christmas and may you have that special Christmas feeling!

No Snow For Christmas Here!

2009-12-05T20:11:00.004-05:00

I remember as a child how I felt on Christmas Eve. My mother was a pushover so if you wanted to know what she got you, you could usually get it out of her. The, what if I don't like it, always worked. In a family with six children the amount of presents surrounding the tree was

tremendous. My father would get the Christmas tree early, but never put it up until Christmas Eve. He put the lights on and most of the ornaments. It had to be perfect. One Christmas he covered the tree with tinsel, it looked like one huge lighted icicle. My preference always was no tinsel, because I wanted to lay under the tree and look up at all of the gilt and illumination above me, a mystical winter woodland, all in one single tree. I use to love the feeling of looking up from under the tree. It was so Christmas. I don't know if I could get off the floor these days. And Florida doesn't give that Christmas feeling, when you are used to being in Vermont. But this is how I like it to be.

The house in a snowstorm is a Christmasy sight. It give me that feeling. Tell me candles don't do it.

Looking out on a snowy scene just brings it all alive.

I miss sitting in front of a fire trying to warm my cold toes. There's nothing like it to enjoy your Christmas Eve.

It's a dream on a delicate snowflake. It's Christmas Eve memories.

Mona Risk gets roasted on Friday 12/4

2009-12-02T18:28:00.004-05:00

Mona Risk is being roasted on Friday the 4th by the http://authorroastandtoast.blogspot.com
The Author Roast and Toast.
On this day we will take Mona to a beautiful beach in South Florida/

Mona looks lovely in her white cover up and flip flops. We have a wonderful array of Greek foods.
Pull up a lounge chair and sit a while. Mona is going to have one heck of a party!

We're looking to party till the sun comes down over the water.

Have a great time!

Play by FoxSaver®

Be Happy! Laugh a lot!

2009-11-28T16:11:00.002-05:00

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop.

Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives; then you'll be afraid to cough.

You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.

I just love this picture, that's why it's here.

Good Way To Start The Day

2009-11-18T21:04:00.002-05:00

This is funny but so very true....

When you have to visit a public bathroom, you usually find a
line of
women, so you smile politely and take your place. Once it's
your turn,
you check for feet under the stall doors. Every stall is
occupied.
Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the
woman
leaving the stall.

You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter, the
wait has
been so long you are about to wet your pants! The dispenser for
the
modern 'seat covers' (invented by someone's Mom, no doubt) is
handy, but
empty. You would hang your purse on the door hook, if there was
one, but
there isn't - so you carefully, but quickly drape it around
your neck,
(Mom would turn over in her grave if you put it on the
FLOOR! ), yank
down your pants, and assume 'The Stance.' In this position your
aging,
toneless thigh muscles begin to shake. You'd love to sit down,
but you
certainly hadn't taken time to wipe the seat or lay toilet
paper on it,
so you hold 'The Stance.'

To take your mind off your trembling thighs, you reach for what
you
discover to be the empty toilet paper dispenser. In your mind,
you can
hear your mother's voice saying, 'Honey, if you had tried to
clean the
seat, you would have known there was no toilet paper!' Your
thighs shake
more. You remember the tiny tissue that you blew your nose on
yesterday,
the one that's still in your purse. (Oh yeah, the purse around
your
neck, that now, you have to hold up trying not to strangle
yourself at
the same time). That would have to do. You crumple it in the
puffiest
way possible. It's still smaller than your thumbnail.

Someone pushes your door open because the latch doesn't work.
The door
hits your purse, which is hanging around your neck in front of
your
chest, and you and your purse topple backward against the tank
of the
toilet. 'Occupied!' you scream, as you reach for the door,
dropping your
precious, tiny, crumpled tissue in a puddle on the floor, lose
your
footing altogether, and slide down directly onto the TOILET
SEAT. It is
wet of course. You bolt up, knowing all too well that it's too
late.
Your bare bottom has made contact with every imaginable germ
and life
form on the uncovered seat because YOU never laid down toilet
paper -
not that there was any, even if you had taken time to try. You
know that
your mother would be utterly appalled if she knew, because,
you're
certain her bare bottom never touched a public toilet seat
because,
frankly, dear, 'You just don't KNOW what kind of diseases you
could
get.'

By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is
so
confused that it flushes, propelling a stream of water like a
fire hose
against the inside of the bowl that sprays a fine mist of water
that
covers your butt and runs down your legs and into your shoes.
The flush
somehow sucks everything down with such force that you grab
onto the
empty toilet paper dispenser for fear of being dragged in too.

At this point, you give up. You're soaked by the spewing water
and the
wet toilet seat. You're exhausted. You try to wipe with a gum
wrapper
you found in your pocket and then slink out inconspicuously to
the
sinks.
You can't figure out how to operate the faucets with the
automatic
sensors, so you wipe your hands with spit and a dry paper towel
and walk
past the line of women still waiting. You are no longer able to
smile
politely to them..

A kind soul at the very end of the line points out a piece of
toilet
paper trailing from your shoe. (Where was that when you NEEDED
it??) You
yank the paper from your shoe, plunk it in the woman's hand and
tell
her warmly, 'Here, you just might need this.'
As you exit, you spot your hubby, who has long since entered,
used, and
left the men's restroom. Annoyed, he asks, 'What took you so
long, and
why is your purse hanging around your neck?'

This is dedicated to women everywhere who deal with a public
restrooms
(rest??? you've GOT to be kidding!!). It finally explains to
the men
what really does take us so long. It also answers their other
commonly
asked questions about why women go to the restroom in pairs.
It's so the
other gal can hold the door, hang onto your purse and hand you
Kleenex
under the door! This HAD to be written by a woman! No one else
could
describe it so accurately!

A Friend Is Like A Good Bra...
Hard to Find
Supportive
Comfortable
Always Lifts You Up
Never Lets You Down or Leaves You Hanging
And Is Always Close To Your Heart!!!

2009-11-15T14:39:00.002-05:00

I am posting this so that you all will have a moment of laughter today!

Birds of a feather flock together . . . ..and then shit on your car .

A penny saved is a government oversight.

The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement .

He who hesitates is probably right.

Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL.'

If you think there is good in everybody, you
Haven't met everybody

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.

Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells 'Theirs...'

Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know 'why' I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.

When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth, think of Algebra.

You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf.

Lord, Keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth . . ... .. . . . AMEN!

One Smile is all it takes to feel better today!

2009-11-10T21:01:00.003-05:00

To put you in a good mood, one big smile will help!

Yes this seems to be helping, I can feel a slight turn up on the edge of my mouth, and I like this picture a lot.

I'm feeling a big grin start to take over my face, I can't help it, it's these pictures.

Oh yes, I am smiling now from ear to ear, so look this blog over whenever you want to smile.

Enjoy the day!!

Just a Reminder

2009-11-05T21:51:00.004-05:00

Don't forget to go to the http://authorroastandtoast.blogspot.com for a great blog and a lot of fun with Cindy K. Green, while we freeze our butts off for this wonderful White Rose Author. Snow bunny, hmmmmm? Sharon's wonderful imagination can almost make me one.

Lyn, Mary and Sharon are shocking the multitudes! You have to check out this blog!!

Forget how you usually feel in the morning and join us for some fun, verbal banter, laughter and a dose of Oliver, Junior, and Cuddles.
What better way to start the day.

Here is my Friday gift to you!

Play by FoxSaver®

This is why God made editors!

2009-11-02T14:18:00.002-05:00

Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn't you say?
Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter
This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day.

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
No crap, really? Ya think?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that's taking things a bit far!
-----------------------------------------------------------
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!
---------------------------------------------------------------
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
No-g ood-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's!
------------------------------------------------------
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial!
----------------------------------------------------------
War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!
----------------------------------------------------------------
If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Ya think?!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought!
----------------------------------------------------------------
Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
They may be on to something!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?
----------------------------------------------------------
Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge!
----------------------------------------------
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Weren 't they fat enough?!
-----------------------------------------------
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That's what he gets for eating those beans!
---------------- ---------------------------------
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken?
************* ***************************
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Chainsaw Massacre all over again!
***************************************************
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!
*******************************************
And the winner is....
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Did I read that right?

WITCHYS WIKKED GRAPHIX

Happy Halloween!!!!!! From Me to You All!

2009-10-31T00:00:00.000-04:00

Mary Ricksen

Daddy Loves Everything About His Little Girl!

Rules to Live By

Yes, I Love Funny Stories! And This Is Funny!

My New Outlook On Life

Friends. What would we do without them.

Laugh and You'll Write Better!

Do You Drink?

Public Speaking

Are You A Dog Or A Cat Person?

The Author Roast And Toast cooks Skhye Moncrief

Januray Burrrrrr Some Graphics for You.

What I Want From 2010

Just A Little Christmas Fun

Author Roast and Toast On Friday 12/18

The Thing About Christmas

It's beginning to get close to Christmas!

No Snow For Christmas Here!

Mona Risk gets roasted on Friday 12/4

Be Happy! Laugh a lot!

Good Way To Start The Day

One Smile is all it takes to feel better today!

Just a Reminder

This is why God made editors!

Happy Halloween!!!!!! From Me to You All!

Beware Of A Witch

May Halloween Frolics Engage You Tonight

Happy Halloween