Mary Ricksen

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Name: Mary Ricksen
Location: West Palm Beach, FL, United States

I moved to Florida in 1980. I was born in Vt., but it's cold sooo long, I'll settle for scenic North Carolina. I enjoy the change of seasons. Spring, summer, winter, and fall, all have such a unique flavor; here it's just too subtle. I loved to ride horses more than anything. My dog Junior is a character in my first book, and there will be more of my pets in my next book. We moved a lot when I was young, from Canada to New York, and from Texas, to Florida. I met all kinds of people, and I find that the more rural it is, the more friendly people are. I have been married for a long time. So long it's like he's my left hip. But I'll keep him, he can fix anything! I have a beautiful secret garden, with everything from Plumeria, to Penta. There is nothing better than sitting out there with a good book and seeing the palms and ferns wave in the breezes, in winter, the real time to be here in Florida. I have written and published my first book in a series that takes place on Lake Champlain in Vermont. My always home. The only thing like the Green Mountains are the Great Smokey's, and a little town called Bryson City, NC. My next home, hopefully!

Monday, June 30, 2008

Giving Advice

My husband and I are both very sympathetic people. We've had a lot of hurdles to cross and we are both aware how hard life can be. I feel like a phone psychiatrist, however.
I listen to people say the same things over and over, and I try to offer advice.

Chris' friend who lives in Texas just bought a house. Later on he learned that the house had a huge fire and a lot of damage was just covered up and not fixed. Well his $200,000 home is now worth $50,0000. Chris has talked to him on Skype dozens of times. He offers advice, his friend does not listen. He meets a stranger who he discusses his problem with, and that person gives him the same advice. And now he listens. What's up with that?
I think that friends don't want your advice. They just want a shoulder to cry on. Trouble is that when you know what they are doing wrong and they won't listen, it drives you crazy. So what does a good friend do.

I think you have to swallow your comments and listen. And let me tell you, listening, just plain listening, is an art. It can be a pain, but it's an art. It hopefully pays you back, when that friend listens to you.

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